Three Keys to Life beyond Pornography
Written by Dan Wobschall
Freedom will not be found in our own strength. In fact, we begin to find freedom
as we recognize and acknowledge our weakness to overcome pornography’s
deceptive pull. Pray daily and surrender your control to defeat sexual brokenness.
This battle is not won in isolation. We need foxhole friends to walk the battleground
with us. The Bible says, “Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another,
that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is
working” (James 5:16). This is accountability defined.
A powerful tool on the road to freedom is using Covenant Eyes. It is an effective form
of accountability. However, the accountability partner you choose is the linchpin to
that chain. Select someone who will hold your feet, heart and soul to the fire without
Trust Christ to set you free.
The power to set us free from pornography must be greater than its power to suck
us into its black hole. No one possesses that power on his own, or he could just
plain stop if he wanted. Therefore, every person must look outside of himself for the
A person’s thinking must change. If a person keeps doing the same thing over and
over, he can’t expect his circumstances and results to change. That’s the definition
of insanity, according to Einstein, anyway (and he was a pretty smart guy).
Problems cannot be solved at the same level of thinking at which the problem was
created. So, just how does a person attack this problem?
First, stop thinking about the very thing you’re trying to break free of. If you say over
and over again, “I’m not going to think about pornography. I’m not going to think about
pornography,” what are you doing? Talking to yourself about pornography, constantly.
The Holy Spirit will do the transforming in a person’s life as he bathes himself in
the words of God (the Bible) and comes under the accountability and mentorship
of faithful friends. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be
transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is
the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
Paul tells us what we should do to renew our minds. He writes, “Finally, brothers,
whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure,
whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there
is anything worthy of praise, think about these things” (Philippians 4:8, emphasis
added). We will become products of our own self-imposed mental environments.
Listen to this reminder: Greater is He (Holy Spirit) who lives in you, than he (Satan)
who lives in the world (1 John 4:4). We have access through prayer and submission
to the very power that raised Jesus Christ from the dead. Incredible!
As we begin to focus on the truth from the Scriptures above, we will begin to
experience the healing only Christ can bring. Confession, accountability software,
time reading the Bible, and prayer are tools God can use to bring about healing.
Open and honest communication with your spouse (wife or husband) is a key in the
healing process. While every situation is slightly different, a person cannot expect trust
to heal if he or she is keeping secrets from his or her spouse.
Spouses also need to heal. Trust has been broken, and we play a significant role in
Men, date your wife again. This was likely an effective way to build trust when the two
of you first met. Humble yourself and start again. After all, you just may be a stranger
to her in emotional ways.
Trust her with your struggles, and share your successes with her. Let her inside your
deepest hurts. Pour love into your wife, and it will be poured back out in greater ways.
Pain revealed is pain that can be healed. It’s true that healing can be painful and
uncomfortable. In fact, expect it. Burn patients understand this in a very profound
way. The more serious the burn, the more pain they experience on the way to healing.
However, as healing takes place, it sometimes leaves scars.
James 5:16 says, “Confess … so that you may be healed.” We will stumble and fall along
the path to freedom from pornography and on the road to healing. And when we do,
we should go back to the Author and Perfecter of our faith, the source of power for the
strength we need, and continue to pray for healing.
Through faith, power and healing, there is life beyond pornography.
The journey will be tough and long, but worth every single step you take. It is by His grace
and a person’s willingness to pursue sexual integrity God’s way that the road to freedom
Prestonwood has a variety of Bible Fellowships for the spiritual development of
every person. No matter your age and stage of life, there’s a Bible Fellowship
for you. Visit prestonwood.org/connect for more information. The Prestonwood
Library, located on the second floor of the Plano Campus, provides additional
resources and services to help Christians grow in faith and ministry. Visit
prestonwood.org/covenanteyes for additional resources.
Used with permission: covenanteyes.com